You know, I read a sad story today here in North Carolina -- hold on, I just remembered a limerick:
There once was a gal named Alice,
Who used a dynamite stick for a phallus,
They found her vagina in North Carolina,
And the rest of poor Alice in Dallas.
The story on TV was about a farm here that had 20 miniature donkeys that had to be sold or given away for some reason. The TV showed all these horsetooth jackasses named JJ French and they needed holmes. I wanted to give them a home. So I mailed one to Silver in Shitcago. I bought the rest and ate them.